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Finding the Good in Bad Situations

“I am content with where I am even though it is not where I planned to be.”

Hello Motivation Seekers, how are you?  For the people in NZ, we have just moved into Level 3, which is a “little” less restrictive than the Level 4 Lockdown of the last 5 weeks.  Most business owners I know, have attempted to start trading in an online and contactless way, but it’s a strange way to do business, that’s for sure.  Especially for those in hospitality, online/contactless seems the opposite of hospitality.

It is really easy at the moment to feel down, anxious and negative.  I know I have days like that and I know how to avoid feeling that way!  It’s to be expected.  We are living through a very trying time, probably the worst we have ever seen.  If someone had told me at the start of the year, that the Government would ask us to close our business for 5 weeks, along with everyone else in the country other than supermarkets, garages and chemists, I would have thought it was someone coming up with an apocalyptic movie script.  Yet here we are, right in the midst of it, and so is everyone else in the world.  When the Government tells us, “we are all in this together”, they really mean it.

How can we cope?  What can helps us get through this?  I hope I have helped you in the last few weeks, through my blogs with tips and ideas.  I was thinking today of something else that can help, it’s a really powerful technique that I find very helpful in dealing with bad situations.  It’s something called reframing.  It is looking for the good within bad situations.

Discover your thoughts and emotions

The first thing to be aware of, is your thoughts and emotions about the situation you are in.  It sounds strange to say that, you might think you know exactly what your thoughts are.  However, really being mindful of this and noticing what you are thinking, when you are thinking it and where these thoughts originated can provide deep and meaningful insights.  The best way to start tapping into this is to keep a journal.  I remember when I started journalling, I had thought I was relatively positive and I noticed that my writing was quite negative.  I found one of my journals the other day, that I had kept when I had a fabulous holiday in the U.K. and Europe with my family.  This was an extremely happy time for me, yet my writing had quite a lot of negatives, mainly about aches, pains and feeling extraordinarily tired and getting upset about things people had said to me.  It was a bit of an eye-opener.  If I had known about reframing, I could have eliminated all that negativity.

Look at the situation with “first time” eyes

This is a brilliant thing to do.  Look at the situation as a child would.  In wonderment, without judgement.  What is happening in your current situation?  Avoid labelling this, just accept that it is what it is.  Know that this is just a stage in time, it will pass as everything does.

Consider any gifts that you have received from this situation.

This is similar to practising gratitude.  It is looking for the good in your situation.  I promise that you will find something.  This is the perfect way to reframe tough times.  It turns the negative into positive, like nothing else can.  I have found lots of gifts in my own current situation.  I have loved that I have had more time to do things I have wanted to do for ages.  I have loved that I have spent more time with my husband, and I have absolutely treasured those times.  Just for simple things, like having coffee out in the deck in the morning, sitting in the sun, listening to the bellbirds sing.  I think every time I hear a bellbird from now on, I will be taken right back to those moments, so they will be happy memories to dwell on.

Anchor those gifts and acknowledge them

As I did with the coffee on the deck time, look for small moments that mean a lot, and anchor them in to your thoughts by writing them down, by talking about them to others, by thanking others for being part of those memories.

Let’s do all of that this week.  Find ways to reframe your thinking so that you are positive and content with where you are at the present time, even though it may not have been your choice.  Have a fantastic week and please feel free to contact me any time if you want to discuss any of this.  I love to hear from you, so don’t be shy, click here to get in touch.  I am also happy to hear any suggestions you may have for future blogs.